The Man of The House

He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced

"From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word
is Law.
You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished
eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert. After dinner, you are
going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want.
Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax.
You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then, you will
massage my feet and hands.
Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"
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The wife replied,
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"The fookin' funeral director would be my first guess."

thats so true he wouldnt have made it past the meal with me tho